It can be much harder for a gay person to lose their virginity due to a lack of awareness and sex education. If you’re gay, you don’t have to worry anymore because we have listed 5 things to know before losing your gay virginity.
- Prepare a bunch of lubes the best you can
If it is going to be your first time and you expect anal sex to happen, you need a bunch of lubes. Like, at least prep 2-3 bottles, if that helps.
Having extra is always a good idea because you never know how much sex you could be getting, too.
But the real reason lubes are so important is that your backside does not naturally produce lubrication on its own, so the extra lube is very much needed.
Try to get lubes that are water-based as they are generally milder on the skin and feel more comfortable.
Lubes are a man’s best friend when it comes to sex with another man as they make things easier and less painful.
Don’t skip on this at all as anal sex without proper lubrication could be painful, uncomfortable, and could increase your risks of infection.
- Maybe you want to wait until you’re physical AND mentally ready
Before you lose your gay virginity, as with all people in the world, you SHOULD wait until you are both mentally and physically ready.
It isn’t just about you doing gay sex or whatever, but it is about the maturity of your mentality and how well-prepared you are on the physical level.
Many people could share with you that their first time was done when they were already physically ready, but not mentally.
Your mind this the largest sex organ and so being mentally ready is just as vital as being physically prepared. Per a publication on the Advocate website, sex is emotional.
Mental preparation supports calmness and reflection. It helps avoid panic and prepares you to experiment, explore, and seek adventure, with any open mind.
Sex education is still taboo in many countries and when it comes to gay sex, there’s even less information/education. So, it is understandable that you could be mentally unprepared.
You also need to educate yourself about the risks of HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases as they are riskier for gay sexual intercourse.
So, on the path of sexual liberation, you could spend a bit more time learning about health provision that is available to you should you need medical intervention.
- It’s okay not to have anal the first time
A lot of young people could get a nervous breakdown at the idea of getting anal sex. It is totally understandable and there is nothing wrong with feeling that way.
Gay sex is no different from hetero sex in that many things can constitute losing your virginity. If you are not down on doing anal sex the first time you are trying to get intimate, that’s your boundary and that’s totally fine.
You just need to communicate this with your partner. After all, gay sex can still be fun, exciting, and satisfying without the anal part.
You can try that at a later time when you are more mentally ready and have got a little bit more experience in the sex department.
Everything takes time, and when it comes to sex, it needs to be mutually pleasant, unrushed and satisfying for both parties. You don’t need to feel guilty about it either.
- The idea is that being sexually intimate itself means losing ‘virginity’
When it comes to the definition of losing one’s virginity, it can get confusing. Even with heteros, it could be arbitrary. Does it happen when the penis enters the vagina?
For gay people, does it happen when a penis enters the backside? The thing is, you lose your virginity the moment you get real sexually intimate with someone.
That’s all. Some people would constitute this as losing your virginity. You could be there doing a blowjob, hand job, and experiencing the pleasures of sex and intimacy and that is equal to losing your virginity.
You’ve got that intimate experience now. You’ve gained your maturity a tad bit now. So, understand that being sexually intimate with someone could mean losing your virginity as long as you feel it.
It’s something you can intuitively tell on your own. Hopefully, it makes you feel good.
- Know that you are more than just your sexuality
Lastly, know that you are more than just your sexual orientation. Homo or hetero, every human being is unique and should be respected for just being.
Even if your other friends have lost their virginity and you haven’t, if you aren’t ready yet, then you aren’t ready yet. And that should be respected.
Understand that losing virginity could mean different things to different people. According to Wikipedia, people of different sex orientations define this act differently.
Many lesbians consider engaging in oral sex and fingering as an act that causes virginity lose. On the other hand, heterosexual couples consider virginity lose to involve penis-in-vagina sex.
For them oral sex, manual sex and fingering doesn’t constitute virginity loss.
You don’t need to prove your worth as a person by having sex with someone. You are not being disrespectful towards someone for denying their advances.
You have your boundaries and you want your first time to be beautiful and memorable. That’s something someone else must respect.
You may be young and still have so much of your education and life to be planned. If that’s more important, go do that and don’t worry about sex just yet.
After all, most people would tell you they wish they could’ve started later!
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- Access to proper medical attention
Performing guy sex for the first time is always fraught with uncertainties and risks. You don’t have the experience of handling it, and may not be well prepared for the eventualities.
Mental and physical preparation is fine. But taking the first deep splash is always tricky. So you must be prepared in case of any problem.
Anal sex has its risks, especially for first-timers. One way of ensuring your physical and medical safety is to find out which medical perils this activity portends.
Threats of deadly STIs are higher in male same-sex. You need to identify likely STIs you may be exposed to, and take mitigative measures.
The next preparation step is to seek reliable medical treatment you can access. Note that some medical facilities don’t cater to this segment of sexual orientations.
Still, talking to your first-time lover may help you. He may introduce you to reliable medical facilities that have been treating him previously.
- May not go well
Having gay sex for the first time is awkward. You don’t know what to do, while your partner may not want to harm you.
So it will appear a bit like clumsy interaction and communication between two people without a common language. Something like language barrier communication.
Expect trials and errors. This is fine since you don’t know what you are doing. Also, expect the unexpected.
It may go better than you expected, which is fine. You can make this your goal by discussing the process beforehand. This way, you can know what to expect.
Still, it may be far worse than your worst fears. The mechanics of anal penetration could be painful and uncomfortable.
Yet, you can make the best of the situation. And it’s the beginning of a long learning curve.
As such, ensure you air your fears and expectations to your partner. This conversation should be continuous. You may engage in it to enrich your future experience.
- The first time might not work as expected
Commencing anything new is always challenging. Sex isn’t exempted here.
Gay sex is a bit different. You may have gotten used to having heterosexual sex. But flipping to gay sex isn’t s direct.
You have to decide whether you want to be the dominant partner or not. Still, you could opt to play both roles on different occasions.
Next, it’s a bit awkward, especially when you just starting. You may find things strange when you are being dominated while you are used to being the dominant partner in the MSW episode.
Don’t worry. You may have planned mentally how to overcome these challenges. Still, it wouldn’t likely go to plan.
Indeed an article appearing on the Ask Men blog concurs that things may not go well the first time, and hence you shouldn’t set high expectations.
So stop imaging a mind-blowing anal rampage, since it’s your first time. Anytime you try something for the first time, it doesn’t work well. Instead set low expectation, but have an open mind.
The initial penetration is always painful and uncomfortable. Your anal muscles are tight and don’t lubricate naturally.
If you find a partner who’s easily carried away with passion, you may find the going rough. Whatever the first guy sex experience, appreciate that this is a learning curve to help you manage the subsequent intercourse better.
- You might not have intercourse at first sight.
Sex is a deeply personal issue. It includes bearing it all, and like their female counterparts, some men also have body confidence issues.
If you have a smaller penis and aspire to be the dominant partner in this relationship, you may feel inadequate. Still, stamina and physique also bring some concerns.
All the same, before you spice things up, you need to be relaxed and comfortable around your would-be partner. Thus it isn’t possible on your first meeting.
Still, you can take the opportunity to know and learn about one another’s hobbies, preferences, and sexual orientation. Next, you can have another date to further cement your trust levels.
Patience and consistency is the key to the bonding process. Gradually, your hormones should start reacting. Harmless physical contact such as holding hands and close skin contact may trigger the necessary emotional desire.
Even as you hold, you may discuss how you want to be handled and agree on the steps to make during intimacy.
- You may be unsure of what you want
Even after planning for the real event well in advance, you still may be lost in the details.
During the first encounter, you may not know what you want. This is normal. You could fumble through the process for a little while.
You may not know of the styles involved in gay sex. To learn faster and have a visual imprint, perhaps you may look at some sex tutorial movies or even gay porn scenes.
Still, you may have problems translating these obvious moves into your life. The verbal explanation may also be misconstrued.
If you feel this frustration, then don’t worry. You aren’t alone, and nobody knows everything the first time.
Like everything else, anal sex takes time and effort to practice and learn. Besides, there is certain sex terminology applicable to guy sex. You’ll have to learn all these and know what they mean and imply.
With patience and determination, you’ll soon master your ways through anal sex.
In conclusion, we provided five things gay people should know before losing their virginity. We hope that reading these things can help you come out of your shell and make you learn more about safe sex options and virginity.
SIMILAR QUESTION
What Counts As Losing Your Virginity When You Are Gay?
Introduction
The concept of virginity has been around for centuries, and it has been traditionally associated with heterosexual relationships. But what counts as losing your virginity when you are gay? This paper will discuss the various definitions and interpretations of virginity among the lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer (LGBTQ) community, and how these interpretations may differ from those of the heterosexual community.
Definition of Virginity
The term “virginity” is often used to refer to a person’s first sexual experience, regardless of whether it is with a man or a woman. The traditional definition of virginity is that it occurs when a person has not engaged in any form of sexual activity, including vaginal intercourse. This definition has been used to create a binary between those who have and those who have not experienced sexual intimacy.
The LGBTQ Community and Virginity
The traditional definition of virginity is often not applicable to people who identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer. While some people within the LGBTQ community may choose to follow the traditional definition of virginity, it is not the only definition of virginity that exists.
One interpretation of virginity among the LGBTQ community is that it occurs when a person engages in their first sexual experience with a member of the same gender. This interpretation allows LGBTQ individuals to create a definition of virginity that is specific to their own identity and experiences.
Another interpretation of virginity in the LGBTQ community is that it occurs when a person has their first sexual experience with a partner of any gender. This definition allows LGBTQ individuals to define virginity as something more than just a physical act. It can also be a psychological and emotional experience, and can be used to create a sense of self-acceptance and belonging.
Conclusion
The concept of virginity is often associated with heterosexual relationships, but this is not the only definition of virginity that exists. The LGBTQ community has different interpretations of virginity, which can be based on a person’s gender identity and sexual orientation. These interpretations can allow LGBTQ individuals to create a definition of virginity that is specific to their own experiences and identities.
